Mand-splaining the teachings of Elbenbo Isn't it thrilling when someone asks you for advice, you give it, they follow it and then they get the results they were looking for? I certainly think so, and that's why I love doing copy critiques. Last week, P.J. Pahygiannis asked for someone who has studied Ben Settle's work to take a look at his lead generation sales letter. I said, I can do it, and he sent it over. The letter was for a client who was offering to get people started with a simple business selling refrigerator magnets with local restaurant menus printed on them. You can make money doing this by selling ads to go along with the menus. Unfortunately, ads weren't getting any leads, so it was my job to help him figure out why. It was written to people who didn't seem to have any real money concerns... The beauty of this business opportunity was that it wasn't super sexy, or glamorous, or hard to understand. More important, it was so simple and straightforward that it would be easy to sell. The problem with the letter was that it was written as if the people reading it would be concerned with the cool factor. When it really should be directed to people who were concerned with the "foolproof" aspect. In other words, he needed to write it for people who might just have a desperate and immediate need to figure out where their next thousand bucks were coming from, and they didn't have time to deal with people who were going to give them the runaround with overly fancy ideas. In terms of lessons from Ben, he had to figure out which villains were the most menacing to the prospect: A mortgage that needed to be paid, or other bills that had to be met, a fear of failure and a growing sense of frustration with people selling complicated solutions that don't bring in money. That was the main thing. The secondary thing was when and where to intentionally break grammar rules... that way his client can sound like a Texan and not a dumbass. Armed with that feedback, he made some changes... A couple days later he said that the leads were FINALLY coming in. He had 50 leads in a few days! If you have something written that is not quite working, or not ready to be published, send it to me. I can give you a critique that is geared towards what is working and how to get more results. Just give me a call or leave a text at 505-515-7001.